Tuesday night we had our weekly worship service, with the theme being new perspectives. We were blindfolded, shuffled around, and we walked, connected, into the room to sit in darkness together. We were the blind leading the blind. Then, we sat and listened. As a group, we shut out our over-strained ability to see and amplified our remaining four senses.
Everyday at work, we depend on our eyes for everything. We use them t0 watch the kids to make sure they're following directions, to make sure everything is going as planned, to connect with them, to keep track of them, to teach them, to learn from them, and to see our peers do the same. For the moments last Tuesday night that we sat in darkness, a wave of relief washed over the room as we realized that for the time being, we could relax. We didn't have to use our eyes for anything. We weren't being asked to watch anyone, to look anywhere, or to see anything. We were being asked to do everything but.
After having the chance to meditate on these thoughts, to soak in the pitch black, to embrace the chance to close our eyes, our blindfolds were removed by each other. This was one of the most symbolic parts of the service to me. Although we are all only human, and we are all blind to God's plan, it is through each other we gain the ability to truly see. Once our eyes were released and free, I opened my eyes to see multiple paintings hanging from the ceiling and interns in front of us playing worship music for us. One of our wonderful house pastors, Sam, spoke to us about disability being relative to each of us, and in everyday. Every single person experiences God in a different way, and it is through listening and learning from each other that we learn more about how to worship God and about who He is. Another house pastor, Esther, gave the analogy that each person's version of God is a small piece and by understanding what God means to others, we begin to see the big picture.
I often fall victim to making general stereotypes of people and assuming. We talked about disability and how all humans are abled, it is only when we are placed in different restricting environments that we are labeled as "disabled." I learned that disability is in all of us and depends solely on the context of the word.
Spending more and more time in Dallas, my life has been shouting to me about all of the privileges and luxuries I am blessed with. Sometimes, I hate myself for this. I see how much less others have out there and I feel as though I have done nothing to deserve the luck I have. I was born into an easy life, as others have done nothing wrong and will never be able to build themselves out of their current situation.
This week has been filled with many trials, late night talks, early morning coffee, and eye opening experiences. I've been thinking lately how difficult it is to truly love yourself. There have been so many helpful quotes to inspire me and motivate me to look into my soul and embrace my heart. This one is working within me right now to help me stay true to my soul and to fill my heart. "We accept the love we think we deserve."
Wednesday night, I paid a visit to Walnut Hill's Family Fun Night! There were lots of creative, interactive, and engaging games for the kids and everyone there seemed to be having a blast! I got the chance to hang out with some of the youth that I have biked with so far, and get to know them better which was a really rewarding thing for me. Here's a shot of a few of my friends playing one of the games that involved stuffing marshmallows in your mouth and trying to pronounce certain words... (HILARIOUS)!
Thursday night, I did the same thing but at Chapel Hill's Family Fun Night! They had a theme of "Time Machine." Each room and activity had a different time period time theme and games that revolved around each. I met one of the elementary girls named Mariah. She was extremely intelligent for her age and told me she had plans to go to college and wanted to be a doctor when she grew up. She called me Barbie all night (since I have blonde hair and my teammate's name is Ken) and pulled my hand around to all of the different games and activities. She was a truly free spirit and such an inspiration for me. I often forget that we are here on this Earth to learn. She was a perfect example of this as she'd ask very intellectual questions and never settle for less than her best. She wanted to try everything, and try she did until she got what she wanted, whether it was the victory, improvement, or the joy from the prize. Chapel Hill has some really creative interns and I'm so honored to know them and get to work with their kids every week! :)
Friday I spent the morning at the North Dallas Shared Ministries center. I don't think they quite expected our visit, so after explaining the organization, they threw us in and put us to work for the next three hours! And what a truly challenging and eye opening experience that was. I got to sit in on multiple interviews which were spoken completely in Spanish so the only words I understood were the numbers! I also shadowed this man named Lou for the day. He was probably 70 years old and taught me alot about who I should strive to be when I'm older. He showed me pictures of his granddaughters and nieces and other family members, and he told me that even though this was a high stress, volunteer position, that he'd much rather be making a difference and spending his time at this organization than sitting at home twiddling his thumbs, or spending his life in an expensive condo in Florida. This was interesting to me because he seemed to be more well-off than his co-workers and mentioned multiple trips he had planned to places like Brazil and Spain with his sons. Crazy, confusing, but quite comfortable and content if you ask me :)
After that wonderful and unexpected experience, I FINALLY got the chance to hang out with some family!! :) I got to hang in the pool, go out to dinner, explore the beautiful area of Southlake, Texas, and spend quality time with my Aunt, Uncle, and Granny! Saturday morning I had the absolute amazing honor and opportunity of learning the art of glass blowing. It's unlike anything I've ever done before and it's very HOT! I had a lot of fun and it made me wish I could take it up as a hobby. The art these people make is stunning and one day I hope to decorate my house with it. Thanks to my great family for letting me have the chance to do this.
We also went on a tour of Fort Worth! I hadn't really noticed how beautiful of a town that is and I loved all of the architecture they have. If I must say, much prettier than Dallas :)
And to end my wonderful (and way too short) of a time with them all, we stopped to eat at this great place called Bread Winning for brunch. I had an amazing pecan waffle and eggs... definitely a scarcity among the many different types of mexican food and casseroles I've been used to this past month!
This morning, for church, I attended Oak Cliff UMC. This was one of the most culturally challenging services I've ever been to. The sermon was in spanish, therefore I listened to a translator through a little earbud that was passed out to those of us who weren't diverse in our languages. Although I wasn't fond of not being able to hear the pastor speak in full enthusiasm and understand what he was saying, I did like the opportunity to sing in Spanish. Even if I had no clue what I was saying, in an odd way, it made me feel like I could connect spiritually to those around me. Worship is universal and language barriers were not going to stop me from feeling God's compassion this morning.
Back to work it is this week....with lots of details to cover, this will be our first official week of riding on the dirt trails at LB Houston (exciting)! I'm excited to see how everything is going to turn out...and I'm excited to also play some more TABOO, since I accidentally stayed up until 4am playing with friends last night! Haha :)
Let peace be with you everywhere you go, especially within yourself, for it is the most valuable accessory you can wear :) And please continue to pray for Project Transformation's interns, the kids involved, and our ability to change their lives this summer.
Listen to this --> Resurrection by Wade Bowen :)
enjoying your blog! comprehensive without rambling :) and great pictures, of course.
ReplyDeleteand I think the place you ate was probably Breadwinners, actually, though I can just imagine Charlie Sheen as the manager of "Bread WINNING!"